physical, emotional, ..you name it.
Abuse.
There should be a drivers license for parenthood.
I can honestly say that my mum just wanted a child because she wanted the fun and laughter that a baby brings. She did not know what she would do in life or which career to take.
My dad just wanted to achieve his goals. To be married and successful before the age of thirty and to have some kids.
So the both of them met.
I can honestly say that I hated every bit of the relationship between my parents. I was scared every day to get home because either my mum would have a mental breakdown or my dad would scream at us ..he would shout so loudly that it would hurt my ears.
They split up went back together split up and so on and so forth. I am 25 now and I am still on my healing journey. It has been 7 years since I could escape that emotionally abusive household.
All that held and holds me together is a strong vision of the person that I want to become. I knock of every goal I set for myself. Be it education, job, money, body, career, … every single one of them just so I do not have to face the hurt of being still with who I am and letting the feelings in.
I think I write this so you know that if you also grew up in an abusive household you are not alone.
I remember calling a help line and locking the door whilst my parents were shouting at me from the outside. I remember my dad pulling the hair of my sister so hard that she would lift from the ground. I remember my mum screaming in anger at me because I did not kiss her hello whilst I was crying on my bed and then coming by at night with a guilty “sleep well”.
I remember being all alone whilst graduating school not really having somewhere I could call home.. and having the worst eating disorder. All the time I had to be the psychiatrist for my mum that to this day presents not to know where left and right is.
To keep this short I want you to know that there are books, YouTube videos, coaches, free stuff, god you can talk to, physical activity and rituals that you can do to help yourself.
YOU ARE NOT STRONG BECAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU BUT DESPIDE OF IT
I love you.
Stay strong! If I can do it you can too <3
xoxo
your froggie community